ever feel like ur happy like u've never been before yet everything is crumbling down around u..

dat's how i feel rite now..yes, i was comfortable but then i got a taste of wat it felt like to be truly happy...and i dun think that i can go back to being juz comfortable..mebbe i'd be able to but not now i guess..

happiness mixed with a lot of heartache too..felt like am being played around like a yo-yo..feel like my heart has been bruised too many times..a friend told me dat if it brings u heartache then i should avoid it..

i tried avoiding it..tried to draw a line...but it gets so hard like you would have no idea..

it's like a situation where it brings u happiness and heartache..and to avoid dat heartache means that u'd also be losing dat happiness too..

i never thot i'd be one for those girls in this situation...if i could look at myself rite now..i'd look at myself in disgrace...

but other than that part of my life, everything has been well and i'm thankful for it..i've got great friends around...i do get homesick at times..well lately most of the times...i miss my sister who is my heart and soul coz no one gets me like she does...i've got a job that is hard at times but i'm loving it at d moment...

n am also grateful that at least there's rita around dat i can talk to...at times like this i miss my dad more...coz i know that he'd be able to guide me...n d person dat i need rite now is my sis..if only it was as simple as gettin d next flight to LA n hell yeah i would step on d earliest flight dat i could get just to spend time wit my sis..but things are never dat simple...

life...it gets to you sumtimes...

thot i'd share lyrics to a couple of songs dat i seem to relate to rite now..

No Good
(Kate Voegele)

I never feared the unexpected
Till I found myself in this peculiar place
Unaware of where I was headed
Turns out it was your footsteps I had chased

Well I should know so much better than this
But you’ve occupied the center of my universe

I’m moving in reverse
Under your mighty curse
I hate myself for loving you
I turn my head away
But my heart will remain
Till the day I learn you’re no good for me

It’s illogical and it’s outrageous
The way I let you keep me hanging on
Your character is that contagious
I know I should have thought before I had done
I’ve gone and let my impulse be my guide
And on that note, I’ll be defenseless for some time

Chorus

Hey you there, keep your distance
Don’t you come around here
Don’t test my patience baby
Cause I ain’t gonna let you off easy

Chorus

dat songs is juz exactly how i feel rite now and d nxt song lifts my spirit me up a wee bit..d song is like d next step to the previous song..

It’s Only Life
(Kate Voegele/Jim McGorman)

Tears are forming in your eyes
A storm is warning in the sky

The end of the world it seems
You bend down and you fall on your knees
Well get back on your feet yeah

Don’t look away
Don’t run away
Hey baby it’s only life
Don’t lose your faith
Don’t run away
Hey baby its only life
Yea it’s only life

You were always playing hard
Never could let down your guard

But you can't win
If you never give in
To that voice within
Saying pick up your chin
Baby let go of it

Chorus

Take your hesitance
And your self-defense
Leave them behind, it's only life
Don’t be so afraid
Of facing everyday
Just take your time, it's only life
I’ll be your stepping-stone
No, don't be so alone
Just hold on tight, it's only life

Chorus